So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Randomize
