hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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