I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize
