Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
