We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
