I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Randomize