Your tits are I can't wait for
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
