Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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