he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
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