didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I accidentally broke up with him while I was drunk which is really too bad since I'd just gotten a birth control perscription so we could start having sex.
Do you think he'd take me back if I said "dude, we need to get back together or this IUD is going to have an existential crisis for not realizing its full potential"?
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
