Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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