it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
