Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
