Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
