Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Your cock deserves a montage
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Randomize
