is your mom at the bar?
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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