If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
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