i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
