take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
