these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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