its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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