You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Randomize
