this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
