dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
