The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
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