I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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