VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Randomize
