Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
