How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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