Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
