dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Randomize
