So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
