Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Im just a social blackout drinker.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize