We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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