Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Randomize
