doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
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