Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Randomize