i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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