Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize