I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Randomize
