I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
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