a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize