just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
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