Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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