my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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