I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
