Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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