Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
