i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Houston, we have a blender
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Randomize
