i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
